Tuesday, December 30, 2008

hello.

just wanted to say that i love being home. a lot. my family is the best. ever.

but i miss him... a lot. it's not fun being apart, that's for sure. i don't want to be mushy gushy, but i'm just being honest. i don't know what else to say, so if you want to know, ask me.

i think i'm working through a lot of things. things that should've been worked through months ago... but i was and am scared to think about them, delve into myself and understand why i feel and think the way i do, especially the ways in which i've felt and thought lately.

i'm trying to trust God. with everything. there are so many changes coming up in my life... it's scary. and so exciting. i'm torn in different directions... but trying to trust God with all of it, completely.

oh, i just love to read. i've read three books since i've been home, and i'm about to devour another. i'm already making a (huge) list of books to read after i graduate!

i'm going to try to stop and see the beauty in everything and everyone tomorrow. yes.

Monday, December 15, 2008

dance.

I just miss swing-dancing.

That's all.

Saturday, December 13, 2008

cleaning spree.

i just went on the first cleaning spree of my life. i think it was a mixture between the darkening sky, the impending snowstorm, over the rhine station on pandora, and the lack of desire to get homework done. the house smells good now, at least. and the bathroom is clean!

i love having a sort-of-family here in colorado. i love being in college and living with people my own age, but it's nice to spend the night in a home, with parents. to eat real food and do family activities. i'm appreciating it more and more as the months go on.

one more week of the second-to-last semester of college. wow. i love people here... but i'm ready to be done with ccu. i'm ready to go into the real world, and stop having my faith fed to me. it makes me want to puke it back up again... and that i have. let me OWN it!

we have a tiny fake christmas tree here... i love the christmas season. but it's hard that i'm so busy right up until christmas... because i wish i could stop and think. think and be and talk to God about it. instead of getting force-fed american consumerism in the christmas season... not to be trite, but that's not what it's about.

oh, how i'm learning. lots of things. how i relate to the world and those around me.

his mom said that if i was a color, i'd be sunny yellow. mm. and he'd be electric blue. ha! true that.

ps: the flobots. good stuff. i was going to post some lyrics from a song from their album 'fight with tools', but i couldn't choose one song. so visit their website, listen to the tracks, read the lyrics... www.flobots.com. yeah denver band!

Thursday, December 11, 2008

i have to say, i'm really glad that it's the weekend. it's a beautiful day!

i love drinking coffee and talking with people about things that we share and love...

i'll be home in eight days. with david. i'm so excited!

almost all that's left is finals. no big deal, really. i've stopped caring at this point, i guess. oh well.

this has been a hard semester. i'm ready to leave it behind and finish college! i'm terrified and ecstatic for what comes next...

i want to sleep a lot on break. and read real books. and talk to people... and go to every coffee shop that i can find. and prepare for next semester... last one of college!

Friday, December 5, 2008

this week has been so good. one morning i woke up and decided to choose joy... and it's made such a difference. i have a long way to go, but i feel like myself. happy and crazy. it's been snowing, and i do love the snow... it means it's finally christmastime. i'll be sad to be away from here for christmas, but happy to be home at the same time.

we've been having so many adventures lately. cutting down trees from forests in the middle of the night (one tree, and it was legal. don't worry), chili's for brunch with free money, apartments, tuxes (i love men's wearhouse. weird), snow, driving, watching wall-e (love it!)... everything.

i got an A on that huge research paper. i'm pretty proud of it... weird, but because i've never been that great in school, it's a big deal when i find something that i'm good at and i love.

i love my roommates. curls in the morning, sugar + peanut butter under the couch (don't love that, actually), crazy everything.

i'm off to watch 'a white christmas'. and i'm so thrilled to see what the future holds!